On a brighter note

I noticed that all my English blog posts lately have been pointless sob stories which in no way adequately depict the way life in Tartu is generally like. So I thought I'd write something more cheerful here for a change. I'm not sure what, because nothing stands out really (maybe Schopenhauer was right in that we only pay attention to the negative experiences in life, while feeling good usually means the lack of noticeable suffering and unpleasant feelings or sensations). Or well... hmm...

Being ill is not really such a good thing in itself, and I've been ill for the last half a week or so, but because I haven't been able to go out or do much anything at all, I've had the time to read, rest and reflect upon various things. Today I found myself looking out of the window in my room... just observing, perceiving, really taking in the various details of the view. Kind of a meditative state of being. I did that a lot in the summer, but these days I've always been so active and overwhelmed by all the novelty here that it's been a while since I felt anything like this. I'm glad I did today :)

Mental tranquillity is nice, but so is mental activity, and the debate club seems excellent for that. I didn't realise just how much my brain was craving for some action till last Monday when we the newbies got to do some intro exercises... even that brief and mild effort needed for them felt like something long-needed for the brain. Which in itself is probably not a good thing (showing that I've not been giving the old grey matter much work), but the debate club is definitely promising. I went to their meeting again yesterday despite still feeling relatively under the weather, and for a while, when I got to actively do stuff, I didn't even feel drowsy any more, it was just so good. They're having another meeting tomorrow, which will hopefully be even better. What's funny is that every time I've gone there so far, I've been afraid that the enjoyment and relative success I've experienced with debating so far has been illusory/a thing of the past/something else like that, that reality will be discouraging, and that I would see the reality at the meeting I was going to. And every time I've just enjoyed it more and more. Of course, it's still only the very beginning and all. But I hope it will continue being like this, being exciting and enjoyable and something that feels quite right for me. Sheesh, why did I never go to the debate club we had in our school? Well, I suppose better late than never... or, then again, maybe now is not late at all, but just right in timing :)

Anyway, this was something more positive.

Oh yes, did you know that a single dose of PCP can have weeks-long negative effects on the mind, including (but not limited to) increased aggressiveness, paranoid delusions and catatonic states? Just something I read from a biopsychology textbook :-P So, have a nice sunny day everyone! Midnight and pouring rain over here :-)