***

And sometimes you can only look into a bright light when you are overwhelmed by an even brighter one. What else can you do when you realise your beloved is you as well as your highest ideal before the formless unknown? When your beloved is a myth and a land, when to be one with your beloved means to live Him. You look into the light, you draw to yourself whatever reflections you can find. Those that are His children in the end, growing to become Him like yourself.

God, I sound like Dion Fortune. I don't believe half the things she writes. Why then do I keep finding myself described in them? My feelings, my aspirations, my loves. Maybe in the end the only thing that matters is that it is something that matters to me. And if I find something to give meaning to my life, maybe that's the one kind of reality that can make one happy in the world of forms.